Recent events have really got me thinking about the family structure and how adaptable it needs to be. This last week our family of 4 was a family of 2 and it was fascinating to see how we ‘adapted’!
Adaptability is one of the most crucial coping skills we need to teach our children. Every child will have a degree of adaptability as their trait, meaning how easily or fast they are able to adjust to changes in their environment. It does not include the initial emotional reaction. Eg: If a parent leaves the home and the child cries (emotional reaction). What happens then? Does the child adapt and attach to the new childminder or is the child unable to adapt and continues to cry?
I found a lovely quiz to help you determine how adaptable your children are:-
Track your answers on the following scale from one to five:
- Do your children cry and get upset when you ask them to finish an activity and move on to something else?
- Do surprises upset your children?
- Do your children find it stressful to change ideas or routines?
- Do you feel like you have to coax or beg your children for days to get them involved in new activities?
- Is it difficult for your children to make decisions and when they do, do they agonize over their choices?
1 __ 2 __ 3 __ 4 __ 5
Adapts quickly Adapts slowly
Looking at your answers you should relate to the following traits:-
- More rigid
- More resistant
- Less comfortable with new people
- Likes routine
- Likes predictability
- More cautious (less risky children)
- Less influenced by peer pressure
- Adjusts quickly to changes
- Happy with new routines
- Easier to parent
- Go with the flow children
- Enjoy new things/places/ideas/activities
- Can be impulsive and risk taking
As adults, we are much less able to change our innate traits or personality, so the more we can encourage adaptability in our children the more they will be able to adapt to the demands of adult and working life.